I've probably *heard about* contemplative prayer a lot of times before the message at church yesterday, but the idea of it didn't necessarily resonate until then. There was a definite nudge as my spirit hit "Ctrl B" before receiving these words. (Side note: He will bolden/highlight things we hear from others-i.e. our leaders, friends, family, favorite authors and speakers, strangers, etc. I'm learning that if sometimes we only take away a few sentences- or words, even- not to become frustrated because we can't recall a whole sermon or conversation, but to see what we do remember as *PRESENTly valuable* and worth further investing our time into. As long as you are pressing in, He will remind you of things He has told you when you need to remember. -Ref. John 14:26)
Whilst fidgeting- switching my crossed legs one over the other- yesterday morning, I knew God was leading me to take a rooftop moment like Peter had in Acts. The "what" and "how" were not clear, but I knew I would come to find out. I needed to be honest with God in every thing and then just listen for His voice.
Confession:
I grabbed my Bible and journal (and cup of joe) to bring with me out on my friend's back deck (my rooftop substitute-lest I break any bone(s)) I had intentions to hear from the Lord, yes...however, mainly just concerning myself (how it could bless me and spur me on). While there is a place for personal encouragement, I knew there was far MORE on the Father's heart than for tailor made prayer only to suit my individual needs. Yet, in His grace, He reveled something so beautiful & humbling about my unique journey, and in reverence and awe... how could I not further seek His heart for humanity?
I'll share first what He gave me about my own walk. Many a time, but more-so recently, I've been incredibly hard on myself. "What good have I really done?...like what eternal impact have I even made? I want to be a bold and fearless vessel used by You, yet I have walked away from so many conversations, Lord & how did I not tell them about Your Good News?"
I was reminded that in all of my 23 years before knowing Jesus, God STILL pursued me. Therefore, His character is that of patience. & it's revealed allllllll throughout scripture! And since He is so, I need not be in a hurry to finish the race having done what the *world* may deem as "tremendous ministry." Notice I didn't say what the Church considers. We need not be in competition with one another. Brothers and sisters, we should be encouraging one another to become more like our Jesus, thus winning souls for His glory.
Being reminded of all He has done with my "old-but-becoming-new" heart 💔➡️❤️in my new self, helped me to have a newfound *thankfulness* for the wilderness season that I'm still journeying through.
"I fed you with milk and not with solid food; for until now you were not able to receive it, and even now you are still not able." (1 Cor. 3:2)
The wilderness, in its entirety, has proven itself beautiful even with its mountain peaks 🗻and valley lows🏞. Yet, "there are treasures to be found in the valley🌈." (Aaron Keyes) And thats why I believe the wilderness is so special. I especially don't want to skip over the hard times. When I first said "yes" to God, He used two ladies to pray prophetically over me, thus encouraging me at the very start of my journey. These women had no specifics to go off...I only approached her with the simple request "will you pray for me?" However, what came next was not simple; it was profound. My spirit wept. He told me to enjoy this closeness with Him. To abide. To remain. And to know I have been forgiven fully and completely. The journey has been exactly that: "even with its bends on the way, I know it's still going somewhere good." (Matt Reynolds, et al)
*I'll never forget God leading me to Grace Midtown right around this same time I was learning about my walk with Jesus. The series was titled "Journey." (Imagine that. Haha.) Anyway, the Lord used the message as confirmation for everything He had already started. It was so comforting! I'm incredibly thankful for that time!*
I'm only still a babe in Christ, and glory to Him for what wisdom He has given and the wisdom He will continue to give. Glory to Him for delivering my soul up out of Sheol- the place I was making my bed. For lifting my head up. Glory to Him for showing me my quick reactions to fear, anger, and offense and helping me unlearn their habitual patterns. For helping me trash my bad attitude and pessimistic outlook by giving me His gifts of peace, hope and joy. For helping to rid me of my strong-willed, self-consuming schedule...one of striving and selfishness to instead, follow Him. (BECAUSE HE MEETS US WHERE WE ARE, IT'S RIGHT THERE -AND NOT ONE STEP AHEAD-THAT HE BEGINS OUR TRANSFORMATION PROCESS. --Remember it's GRACE that saved us and it's GRACE that changes us.--Stay in your place on the race. The space from who you are and who you're {becoming} is full of His grace. Don't look to the right or to the left, but keep your eyes fixed. *anddd that's a w(rap)*)
Glory to Him for delivering me from a spirit of shallowness- to see hearts and not physical bodies. Thank You, Lord! Glory to Him for giving me an enjoyable job that humbles me. For being able to work with my hands every day while learning more about God and finding Him in the said "lowly tasks." Glory to Him for helping me have courage to go into my deepest pain, brokenness, and darkness -in faith that He would be right there with me to forgive, mend, heal and RESTORE. For making me brave enough to step into unknown waters and into unfamiliar territory. For experiencing resistance and let down, which only pushes me closer to Him. Bill Johnson says, "if we are not having any resistance in life, there is a good chance we are going in the same direction the devil is going."(Resistance, therefore, seems like a key indicator that we have not forsaken Christ by trekking backwards...so, moving forward means the work of Satan will come up against us. So unless there's no opposition because you've moved further away from your Friend, Comforter and Guide- "do not be afraid...He that is in you is greater than he who is in the world!") ***If your success is not from the Almighty, DO become aware that it is fleeting and will wither and fade. Furthermore, Romans 1 warns us that because of our free will to choose, He hands us over to our vile passions as a form of His wrath. In other words, He lets people chase what they want over and above Himself. If you've tasted and seen His goodness & lovingkindness, you know NOTHING is better than being in communion with Him. "Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth..." Success in the eyes of the Father looks different than what the world perceives as flourishing.
"DO be careful how you define success. What you may actually be looking at is the outpouring of God's wrath on a man/woman's life...Be careful how you judge your life; successes and failures not marked by external realities but rather a hope-filled faith, step-by-step obedience to Jesus Christ." (Matt Chandler)***
Glory to God for helping me see the real enemy and making me aware of the spiritual war that is raging around us. For His confirmation... His Word and His peace, even when His plan looks incredibly backwards and misunderstood by many. "He is not the Author of confusion."
Thanks be to God for helping me be more quick to forgive by letting go of all offense and its ugly fruit: bitterness, resentment and self pity. To instead be quickened to love because I know the price Jesus paid on the cross was for me AND for "them." And for showing me what love really is. For changing my dangerous and worldly reasons for marriage into deeply rooted, godly desires. For Heaven's perspective on covenant relationship, lest I become another statistic in the divorce rate. For giving me His strength in refusing to settle. For patience to work through anger and buried wounds from my parents' brokenness. For GRACE to walk through my past and the rebellious choices I have made because of the pain. For completely undoing, and delivering me from a lustful, manipulative, and seductive spirit. HALLELUJAH! Thank you, Jesus!
For godly reasons in having children. His heart's desires for family and the dynamic of each relationship- in which the purpose is to reflect Christ and His Bride, the Father and His children. Pointing me, also, always back to Him. What a beautiful design! To raise world changers, kingdom builders and winners of souls. To love on and instill them with Truth.
...But even if that is not His will for me,
I have found the One whom my soul loves. And He is more than enough! Every thing I will ever need is found in Him! And only He can fill us to overflowing! His grace is sufficient in ALL things!
*I am convinced that we should always take these good and holy desires to Him. As we lay them down and put them in God's hands, He is faithful to give and take away as He knows best! "Trust in the Lord, and do good; dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness. Delight yourself also in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart." (Psalm 37:3&4) I encourage my single friends who are remaining steadfast in your season, to always tell God what is on your heart. Intercede for your future husband or future wife if the desires do not go away. Yes, even if you have not yet met. In the same breath, rejoice and be content with what He has given you today. Continue {becoming} that person for someone else!* "Waiting is a sustained effort to stay focused on God through prayer and belief." (Max Lucado)
Glory to God for helping me have a deep longing to be with Him every day and to love Him with all my heart, soul, strength, and mind!! Glory to God who is helping me love myself better, because in my Father's eyes I am precious. Denying my worth is hurtful to my Maker. ...Imagine spending years writing a book and when it was published, your audience raved about the creative story! However, the book had opinions of its own and found itself to be ordinary and a disgrace to the book race, no longer wanting to be copied, sold, and shared. In fact, it hid away from anyone to see. Even its artist. It not only disliked its story but the cover...oh, the cover! "How dare you choose me with this appearance! And why didn't you make a stronger summary?" How might you feel if that was your work? I suppose our Creator feels the same way about us when we refuse to view ourself with confident belief that He chose us, created us in His image, and gave us life {for such a time as this!}And that's absolutely beautiful!...Thanks be to God for choosing me. For His grace when I chose Him back. For making me alive in Christ and giving me an identity and purpose as a daughter of the Most High.
Glory be to God who is showing me that the words of Psalm 139:13-16, He wove into my DNA. I will praise Him!
Glory to Him as He continues to shine a light on the world around me. On those who look different than me...who have different interests, backgrounds, and stories. By resisting His will to meet others outside of our said "comfortable," we not only limit our ability to encounter the Father in His fullness by learning His different facets, but we rob the world of something special and also God of His glory. There is something unique about Him that's in you for the world to see."Made in His image."
The song "Build my Life" by Housefires came to mind as I was in contemplative prayer. Specifically the lines: "open my eyes in wonder & show me who You are & fill me with Your heart & lead me in Your love to those around me."
While the majority of the song reminded me of my journey in the wilderness...unlearning lies about God and about myself by building a firm foundation on Jesus...I keep clinging to those lines "fill me with Your heart & lead me in Your love to those around me."
This is the Father's heart isn't it?
To love those around us.
There are cultural barriers we face at work.
There are racial divides at school.
There are all kinds of tensions in our day-to-day because of deep wounds we have caused one another in history's past. None of it was from the Father. None of it was from Him. He is good. He is love. He is commUNITY in of Himself (Father, Son, and Holy Spirit). Humanity is hurting. Humanity needs the Church to be radical in the way we love one another.💞❤️💚💙💓💛❣️ We need to step over/rip through these said "barriers" and "divides" especially inside the Body. We need to grab our brothers and sisters by the hands and stand united. ✌🏾✌🏼✌🏿✌🏼And together, we need to meet the lost and hopeless in the trenches and look at them in the eyes. We need to look at them in the eyes. With the eyes of Jesus. Something happens when you look at them in the eyes with Love.👁👁🔥🔥❤️❤️
Why is he/she angry?
Why does he/she feel discriminated against?
Why can't he/she smile back?
Why is he/she on the streets?
Why is he/she selling their body for money?
Why does he/she have an eating disorder?
Why is he/she an alcoholic?
Why?
We need to get in the trenches with them.
I am all too guilty of being a hearer of the Word👂🏼and not a doer of the Word🏃🏽♀️. Of carrying a burden for the minorities, mistreated, misunderstood, and "least of these," however, while never reaching out.👐🏼Of carrying a burden for the lost, but not seeing it through. Mostly, by a lack of courage and confidence, of not feeling equipped...of fear.
"What does it profit, my brethren, if someone says he has faith but does not have works? Can faith save him? If a brother or sister is naked and destitute of daily food, and one of you says to them, 'Depart in peace, be warmed and filled,' but you do not give them the things which are needed for the body, what does it profit? Thus also faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead." (James 2:14-17)
But after a good message yesterday and my own rooftop with God, I felt compelled to share. Even in the wilderness, growing in the "fundamentals" of what it means to be a Christ follower, we are still walking and moving. We are not stagnant. We have a strong tower to run to, but we are not "hidden." God doesn't cover our eyes so we can't see what's happening. Instead, He broadens our outlook. (Debbie Waldrep) We face a dark world, still. BUT we carry the light of Christ.
He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High
Shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.
Shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.
I will say of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress;
My God, in Him I will trust.”
My God, in Him I will trust.”
Surely He shall deliver you from the snare of the fowler
And from the perilous pestilence.
And from the perilous pestilence.
He shall cover you with His feathers,
And under His wings you shall take refuge;
His truth shall be your shield and buckler.
And under His wings you shall take refuge;
His truth shall be your shield and buckler.
You shall not be afraid of the terror by night,
Nor of the arrow that flies by day,
Nor of the arrow that flies by day,
Nor of the pestilence that walks in darkness,
Nor of the destruction that lays waste at noonday.
Nor of the destruction that lays waste at noonday.
A thousand may fall at your side,
And ten thousand at your right hand;
But it shall not come near you.
And ten thousand at your right hand;
But it shall not come near you.
Only with your eyes shall you look,
And see the reward of the wicked.
And see the reward of the wicked.
Because you have made the Lord, who is my refuge,
Even the Most High, your dwelling place,
Even the Most High, your dwelling place,
No evil shall befall you,
Nor shall any plague come near your dwelling;
Nor shall any plague come near your dwelling;
For He shall give His angels charge over you,
To keep you in all your ways.
To keep you in all your ways.
In their hands they shall bear you up,
Lest you dash your foot against a stone.
Lest you dash your foot against a stone.
You shall tread upon the lion and the cobra,
The young lion and the serpent you shall trample underfoot.
The young lion and the serpent you shall trample underfoot.
“Because he has set his love upon Me, therefore I will deliver him;
I will set him on high, because he has known My name.
I will set him on high, because he has known My name.
He shall call upon Me, and I will answer him;
I will be with him in trouble;
I will deliver him and honor him.
I will be with him in trouble;
I will deliver him and honor him.
With long life I will satisfy him,
And show him My salvation.” (Psalm 91)
And show him My salvation.” (Psalm 91)
So we know GRACE is 1. transformative, but it is also 2. participatory. (Justin Fry) We need not let our seasons be excuses or reasons why we don't execute love. Love is His nature and your nature in Him! "Every thing Jesus teaches us can't be something we just receive from Him, it must be something we do for one another." (Margaret Reynolds)
"That's what it means to participate in GRACE. To receiveand to give. Even when it's hard. Even when it seems impossible. And even when we must extend that GRACE to our enemies. GRACE can no longer be an excuse for us to live in unloving ways towards ourselves, others, creation, or even our enemies." (Fry)
•"Bless and do not curse." (Romans 12:14)
•"Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, IN EVERYTHING give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you." (1 Thess. 5:16-18)
•"And let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart. Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all, especially to those who are of the household of faith." (Gal. 6:9&10)
To ALL- even the wounded, bitter, angry, sad, hopeless and loss people. May they know and believe that "every plant which My Heavenly Father has not planted, will be uprooted." (-Jesus, Matthew 15:13)
God's Kingdom is at hand. "On earth as it is in Heaven."
It is flourishing and it is blooming!🌸💐🌷🌺🌼
Thanks be to God for blessed HOPE (Titus 2)❤️
Dear Lord, thank You for Your Word each day. You are good to give us exactly what we need. We do not want to miss out on the present moment and the opportunities in our today by worrying about our tomorrows. You are making all things new and we want to be at peace with the process. Lord, fill every sister and brother with Your heart today. May we always seek You first to hear and see where You have gone before us. May we have the courage to follow You, to step out and be radical in Love- standing united with our brothers and sisters even if there is resistance. May we be quick to forgive, dropping every offense, by remembering the cost You paid on the cross. May we offer GRACE so freely. May we look to the lost with holy fire in our eyes. May they see His light shine. We are always growing and mending, but remind us that you never desire perfection. Your power lives inside us and You are faithful to equip us, even as we journey through the wilderness. When we are weak, You are strong! May we be salt and light. May we give what receive. Thank You, Lord. We love You! It's in Your name we pray, amen!
With Love💘,
-K
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